Direction-less

Sun Oct 23, 2011 2:09 pm by Earth_Girl

This might go along with some of the other discussions All-is-sun and I have been having on the board lately, but I thought it warranted a new thread anyway.

I have been feeling...lost, lately. I am not sure what I am doing anymore, as far as where my life is going. I have a degree in women's studies and sociology that is essentially useless (unless I live in a large city, which I feel is akin to committing suicide at this stage in collapse -- plus my acute social anxiety would not help in that situation). Is my college education completely worthless? Did I spend all that money for nothing?

Things and plans/dreams that I once had don't seem as important, or are perhaps impossible to reach at this point. It feels as though I am settling in to working at the grocery store and not really doing anything with my life, and that scares me. I've mentioned there is someone in S. Carolina I would like to be with, but aside from that, I'm not sure what I would do down there; work at another grocery store perhaps? Should I even go to S.C. for that matter?

Wondering if anyone else is feeling the same, and if so, how are you coping? Are you trying to create new plans and dreams? I guess the biggest thing one asks once they become "awake" to PO and Collapse is, "OK...now what?"

So where do we go from here...?

Mon Oct 31, 2011 1:10 pm by tata

Hi, I'm new here.

I'm feeling very much the same, though my situation is quite different. The whole "doom" thing is new to me (thank you, current-political-climate-in-US) and it's left me feeling... paralyzed. I have children, so I cannot run to NYC or some other equally large city and join the protests. I suffer from various forms of mental illness (namely OCD, anxiety, depression), so I cannot boycott Big Pharm. I attend college full-time but seriously reconsidering since no fewer than a dozen of my acquaintances cannot find work with Bachelor's or even Master's degrees. I can't focus, I can't live in the now. I feel inclined to run away, but to where? Nowhere is safe. I'm not coping well at all and it's worse since my husband and I lost our insurance last July. Luckily, my shrink is still giving me a little of his time pro-bono and writing me 'scripts, but I'm tempted to quit 'em cold turkey. Not like I'll have access to meds for much longer anyways, right? The closest thing to motivation I have felt recently is stockpiling canned goods and water and guns. Taking up some new hobbies that aren't so expensive and are relevant are one idea I have (gardening, sewing, etc.), but not something I have much time for (see aforementioned kids and college).

Sigh.

Mon Oct 31, 2011 1:27 pm by Earth_Girl

tata wrote:Hi, I'm new here.

I'm feeling very much the same, though my situation is quite different. The whole "doom" thing is new to me (thank you, current-political-climate-in-US) and it's left me feeling... paralyzed. I have children, so I cannot run to NYC or some other equally large city and join the protests. I suffer from various forms of mental illness (namely OCD, anxiety, depression), so I cannot boycott Big Pharm. I attend college full-time but seriously reconsidering since no fewer than a dozen of my acquaintances cannot find work with Bachelor's or even Master's degrees. I can't focus, I can't live in the now. I feel inclined to run away, but to where? Nowhere is safe. I'm not coping well at all and it's worse since my husband and I lost our insurance last July. Luckily, my shrink is still giving me a little of his time pro-bono and writing me 'scripts, but I'm tempted to quit 'em cold turkey. Not like I'll have access to meds for much longer anyways, right? The closest thing to motivation I have felt recently is stockpiling canned goods and water and guns. Taking up some new hobbies that aren't so expensive and are relevant are one idea I have (gardening, sewing, etc.), but not something I have much time for (see aforementioned kids and college).

Sigh.

Hi tata, thanks for the reply, and welcome! I know being new to PO/Collapse can be scary, but we have to have hope for a better future once the current paradigm fades away. I would suggest talking to your doctor(s) about weening off your meds, don't go cold-turkey, it'll be like a terrible hangover all day, every day, for weeks or more. I tried it once, not a good time. I am trying to ween off my anti-depressants too with the help of my doctor. Take things slowly.

Preparing and taking up new hobbies is good. Glad to hear you're trying, I guess that's all we can really do these days. Browse the forums, there's lots of information here, and if you need any help let us know, we're family here.

Mon Oct 31, 2011 1:49 pm by roccman

Hi Tata - welcome to the forum.

Adapting to a power-downed world is not going to be easy. And for some it comes sooner then for others as you have described.

I was out of work almost a year to the day ago. I was the sole bread maker for our family (now my wife has a job). I can remember many sleepness nights - how would I come up with $1500/month for medical insurance alone? Food/rent etc.

I very luckily found another job quickly. But that luck could end any day - then what?

To make my situation even a bit more "challenging" my daughter is a type I diabetic - insulin is not gonna be available when the collapse gets going - I try not to think about this too much, but it is always there.

I guess all of us are gonna feel pain. KNowing this has helped me...and i hope it can help you. Don't be too hard on yourself or your situation - and if it does ever get to that point - send someone here a message. We all are holding on to each - we just don't show it all the time.

Keep well

r

Mon Oct 31, 2011 1:56 pm by allissun

Earth_Girl, thank you for a really great response to our new member, tata (welcome tata

).

I don't know too much about meds, but the idea of slowly weaning off them for certain things gets my approval!

I hear you, tata, about not going to the protests. I have a child, too. So as mothers (or parents, for that matter) our primary responsibility is to care for and protect our children the best we possibly can. Period.

Waking up to some of the realities of the way things are in the world today is certainly a very big pill to swallow.

I hear you about having a hard time to focus, and to feel like you cannot be fully present in the moment. That's kind of hard to do, even without meds or self-medication, at first, but I would say just try to be gentle with yourself on that one.

Sometimes a good way to slow down the thought-processes is to do, or, in other words, take action. Do you have older relatives who can teach you some old-fashioned skills like canning, if you don't already know how to do that?

I looked on freecycle and craigslist for free canning materials a few years ago and got lots of great equipment and bottles for free, and got my mom involved and learned how to do that. That's what I'm doing today. Hahhaa, I wish some of you were here to help with the 200 lbs of tomatoes, both red and green, that I have to process this week.

Welcome, again, tata, and like Earth_Girl and roccman said to you, we're here to help and we are, like one big family.

Mon Oct 31, 2011 5:57 pm by tata

Thank you for the nice welcome.

Our shrink appointment was today and he suggested that I take a break from the internet, since the news of occupations world-wide are causing me much additional anxiety. He thinks (and I think I agree with him) that the guilt of avoiding the news is better for me than the news. We switched the meds and dosing around some and he urged me to reconnect with others. The recent stuff has left me seeking isolation. I think it's a good plan and intend to follow his orders until I can get a better grip on my present situation. I need to decide whether or not the investment in college is still a good one for me. This is my most pressing issue.

My family situation (parents and siblings, not husband and kids) is weird; there is much I can learn from my mom but neither of us currently has the time. She has 10 acres and lives about an hour away. I would like to take up spinning (I'm a knitter) and definitely gardening. I'm not sure she's interested in canning or much else; she owns her own business where she works 6 days a week in addition to her farm.

I'll be checking out the forum Post-Cornucopian Living for sure. My husband would also very much like to live less on the grid, despite relying rather heavily on electricity (it's America; who ain't?!). He's been worried about impending doom for a while now, so we're at least on the same page there. I think for the next several days, my doing will be researching here on getting a garden going and making more definitive plans to prepare for... well, whatever is coming. Husband is inclined to think it's solar flares and/or planetary alignments stuffs while I'm more concerned about the political climate and what I suspect is a Police State. We're in agreement that we definitely rely far too heavily on fossil fuels.

Mon Oct 31, 2011 6:12 pm by Earth_Girl

tata wrote:Thank you for the nice welcome.

Our shrink appointment was today and he suggested that I take a break from the internet, since the news of occupations world-wide are causing me much additional anxiety. He thinks (and I think I agree with him) that the guilt of avoiding the news is better for me than the news. We switched the meds and dosing around some and he urged me to reconnect with others. The recent stuff has left me seeking isolation. I think it's a good plan and intend to follow his orders until I can get a better grip on my present situation. I need to decide whether or not the investment in college is still a good one for me. This is my most pressing issue.

My family situation (parents and siblings, not husband and kids) is weird; there is much I can learn from my mom but neither of us currently has the time. She has 10 acres and lives about an hour away. I would like to take up spinning (I'm a knitter) and definitely gardening. I'm not sure she's interested in canning or much else; she owns her own business where she works 6 days a week in addition to her farm.

I'll be checking out the forum Post-Cornucopian Living for sure. My husband would also very much like to live less on the grid, despite relying rather heavily on electricity (it's America; who ain't?!). He's been worried about impending doom for a while now, so we're at least on the same page there. I think for the next several days, my doing will be researching here on getting a garden going and making more definitive plans to prepare for... well, whatever is coming. Husband is inclined to think it's solar flares and/or planetary alignments stuffs while I'm more concerned about the political climate and what I suspect is a Police State. We're in agreement that we definitely rely far too heavily on fossil fuels.

Sounds like you have a plan tata, or at the very least a direction. I think the spinning is a great idea -- anything that you can see yourself doing post-collapse, because the jobs and careers of today won't be around for much longer. If you want to go to college, I would suggest taking a few classes at a time, and paying as you go. Don't take out any student loans, it's not worth it, they're a trap that some (myself included) have fallen into these days, and now have no prospects in their field. I would say that it would be better to learn some kind of skill or trade that would aid you in the future; myself I know how to make things out of wood and do some carvings here and there. I need more practice, it's not professional stuff or anything, but it's pretty good from what people tell me.

As for your mom's farm, sounds like you have a place that you can go if things fall apart. Others here have more experience with that, but I'd say get your preps set up at the farm, let your family know about your preps and plans, focus on growing as much food as you can and slowly ween yourself from the grocery store. One thing at a time, you'll get there.

allissun wrote:Earth_Girl, thank you for a really great response to our new member, tata (welcome tata )

Thanks Alli, I try.

Tue Nov 01, 2011 10:26 pm by MGD

Welcome Tata.

I hear you, and EarthGirl too. Dealing with all this is 'huge!' A few things have been the most helpful for me. One is Carolyn Baker's books, "Sacred Demise" and "Navigating the Coming Chaos; another is Transition Towns; another is going to Tom Brown Jr's Tracker school (primitive skills + I rediscovered and deepened a passion for learning about wild edible foods).

A funny thing about getting in touch with the reality of 'collapse' is that you eventually come to realize that it is what life is and has always been about. We all die and we never know when that will be. We all suffer to various degrees and it usually has nothing to do with whether we are 'good' people or whether we make 'good or bad' decisions. Life happens and at anytime things can go terrible wrong. By confronting this we can learn to be present in ways most people rarely experience.
That's why we call the people who are not aware, who refuse to be aware, Zombies.

Life is so much more precious now because I understand that all I have is this moment.

It is a difficult journey. Hang in there.

Tue Nov 01, 2011 11:29 pm by allissun

MGD, thank you for including the book titles, and your post is right on! Very sane perspective.

I especially liked this thought: "We all die and we never know when that will be. ... Life happens and at anytime things can go terribl[y] wrong. By confronting this we can learn to be present in ways most people rarely experience."

Thanks again.

(with respect, i hope you don't mind the edit... wasn't sure but let me know and i'll change it back)

Wed Nov 02, 2011 8:46 am by MGD

Thanks for the edit

-whoops.

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